Every Friday night, Jews around the world prepare for the Sabbath; they cook delicious foods, set beautiful tables and gather with family and loved ones to welcome the Sabbath. Candles are lit, prayers are said and the traditional greeting is “Shabbat Shalom,” a wish for a peaceful Sabbath. Last week, when the Jews in Pittsburgh wished each other a Shabbat Shalom, never in their wildest dreams would they have thought they would be attending the funerals this week for their brethren, their parents, their wives, husbands, brothers, sisters, dear friends.

Rabbi Dov Peretz Elkins recounts the following story of the Buddha in his book Moments of Transcendence: Inspirational Readings for Rosh Hashanah:

The Buddha’s disciples turned to him one day and asked: “Are you a god?”
“No, I am not a god,” he answered.
“Then are you an angel?” they asked.
“No,” answered the Buddha, “I am not an angel.”
“Are you a prophet?”
“No, I am not a prophet.”
“Then,” they continue to press him, “Who are you?”
To this the Buddha replied, “I am awake.”

I am so blessed to work in a setting where I have the opportunity to do meaningful work. As the chief development officer for Menorah Manor, a not for profit nursing center, I oversee the work of our Foundation, which raises funds to benefit the seniors who reside in our communities. I love seeing the generous dollars from our donors being put to good use as I walk through the halls every day, and see firsthand the lives of our residents being enriched through philanthropy.

• Recognize that they have a disease. Remember that your loved one is not intentionally trying to make your interaction with them difficult.

• Avoid distractions. Find a quiet place to talk with your loved one. You can also attend a program together. This is helpful, if you are struggling to maintain a conversation.

• Speak slowly, clearly, in a calm voice. Use short sentences and provide your loved one time to absorb the information. Sometimes information has to repeated several times for them to understand it.